love and loss

Hi there!

Some thoughts of mine...

There seems a pertinent resistance to love within humanity. We've forgotten our true nature. We hold back our hearts from a deep place of knowing that the love we feel may disappear one day, so why bother? We've had plenty of experiences where we have loved and lost, or felt betrayed by love, so we think. Isn't it easier then to love half-way, or not at all, to prevent the pain of losing love one day in the future?

People, this fear is greatly flawed and causes much suffering. Through my own fear and suffering I've realized it is futile (and painful) to hold back the gates on the power of love. Love will always win. Love is a vibration infinitely greater than fear. Can you feel the suffering you create for yourself by shutting yourself down to love? The suffering you cause yourself by resisting your true nature? Blocking love causes dis-ease, causes heart attacks, causes death. While the pain of grief and loss is tremendous, I know, it's actually a portal to a deeper understanding of love. If you allow your grief, really drop into it, cry, shake, get mad, whatever you need to do, you'll find a tunnel to light that will fill you, for you are love in form. Allow the waves of pain and fear as they come, embody them, and you'll find a deeper knowing of your true nature, love, on the other side. In love we are safe, for our essence vibrates with love, we are love. It is dangerous to our health to shut down love or block it, in doing so we are denying our true human nature.

Today, 11:11 is a powerful day, look it up!

What we see we are

Hi beautiful, 

I found myself at an Asian diner. Lately I've been noticing that I tend to explore the shadow aspects of life, I get pretty focused in on the heavier emotions - grief, pain, loss, anger, sadness... which are important to explore, lots of learning there, but I would also like to value, maybe even more so, the lighter side of life. I've gotten pretty good at catching myself judge another and then looking inward "what is this in me?". I long to have these same experiences with Joy and Love! I was so happy yesterday that a little light turned on in my eyes and I saw my own beauty reflected in another. I stopped at this little Asian food place I'd been wanting to try and was completely struck by the grace and beauty of the young woman who helped me. Her eyes glowed, she was so pure, so kind. I sat and waited for my food and it was like a little rain drop hit me right between my brain hemispheres...OH MY GODDESS...Her beauty is my beauty, what I see in her I possess... I drove home in a state of bliss. My eyes felt different, more clear, more blue, more understanding. What a gift, thank you.

Ready to know, feel, experience.....and monetize....the beauty of YOU as a Soul?

Katie Awake Online 

I midwife my clients through soul birth of their infinite potential; through and beyond childhood and past life trauma.  The result for them is more happiness now, more pleasure in their bodies, soul mate relationships, more money & the birth of their sacred work further into the world

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Inspired in the Discount Tire Outlet

Hey there,

I am having spiritual experiences in the most unexpected places. I was buying new tires (finally) pretending to be interested in a magazine but really observing all the other people in the waiting area. I noticed my perceptions about the other people were sort of judgemental, based on past experiences I guess.. this older couple came in with a flat tire and there was young guy working the counter. I right away assumed that the older husband man would be rude to his wife and rude to the sales guy, I was wrong. The three of them were friendly and joking around, their sale cost less than they expected and they were all happy. I sat there in shock. Why had I assumed these people wouldn't get along? I guess it doesn't matter, but I sat there feeling inspired by the friendliness of these people, a simple example of people helping each other and being friendly, just for the sake of being nice. Ironically, I was in a spot of deciding whether or not to make an appointment to see my healer, and it hit me that I had just experienced a healing in that discount tire outlet.

xoxo

Katie   

Yoga writings - Yama #1 - Ahimsa (non-violence)

Hello readers, recently in the power yoga teacher training that I am honored to be assisting as coach, I was asked to speak on the yamas and niyamas, being that I feel most natural writing I thought I'd unravel more of my thoughts on the yamas and niyamas here in my little bloggy-blog.

The yamas are first on Patanjali's eight limbed path towards enlightenment. The yamas are the "do's", do practice these five and you will be walking towards a fuller expression of yourself, of unconditional love. Later, I'll get to the Niyamas, which are the 'don't 's", the avoids.

Yama number one, Ahimsa (non - violence)

Avoid causing harm to yourself, to other people, to all beings on the planet. Most obviously this includes physical harm, avoid what hurts. This can include picking at your skin, shoving another person, squishing bugs, plucking plants...etc. Notice the hesitation right before these acts, the recognition that I'm about to hurt myself or someone else, or something else. Trust that feeling, that inner knowing that what I'm about to do isn't right, and refrain. Walk away from the mirror, restrain your 'joking but I'm not joking' shove of your friend, take the bug outside where it belongs. We built our houses on their territory anyway.


Practicing ahimsa, non-violence, also refers to our thoughts, how we perceive ourselves and how we perceive others. Most likely how you see yourself, how you talk to yourself, is rooted in deep habit. Patterns we picked up very young and most of us don't love ourselves, we pretty much come to this planet to learn how to love. Reversing a habit begins with observing the existing habits. Look at yourself in the mirror, how do you think about yourself? I read an article recently where the writer would feel some skin on her belly and her immediate thought was 'gross'... can you relate to this? I can. Lets start noticing this negative self talk, notice the 'gross' and replace it with 'I love you'. Does that feel better? When we love ourselves, these bodies, we feel better and more good comes to us.


Notice how you judge another. When we judge another we're actually judging an aspect of ourselves that we are ashamed of. For example, I might observe someone with road rage (swearing, shaking fists, etc) and think 'woah they are nuts, get a hold of yourself', when really I am judging the part of myself that is just too scared to ever honk at someone on the road. Another example of projecting, I might judge someone for eating fast food and think 'how can they eat that stuff, that's not even food', when really I miss cheeseburgers and I have restricted a part of myself that wants to just eat a damn big mac. See what I mean? Start with non-personal situations, notice when you're judging strangers or tv shows, things that are far away and then get real "what part of me am I really judging here?" If you dare, try implementing this into your relationships, when you're annoyed with your partner, or with your parent, or whoever...and ask yourself, what is this really about? what is being mirrored to me right now? Judgement is an act of violence to the other and to ourselves, when we judge another we are actually judging ourselves, we're all connected.



In the yoga practice:


It is an act of violence to force the body into a posture it is just not ready for. Notice when you are straining to try and get into pose. To practice ahimsa in yoga be gentle, be loving, be with yourself where you are today and the body will be glad and naturally stretch and open on it's own time schedule. Unfortunately we are not walking, talking stretch armstrongs. Most people are not naturally super flexible, the magazine covers are not a good basis for reality. We have these human bodies made of bones, ligaments, fascia, muscle, it is a lot to try on new shapes and forms, be patient, it will come with time.

That's all for now, hope this was helpful, Yama number two Satya (Truthfulness) to come soon.

Power Poem by Rebekah Shaman

We think we're victims but we just don't see

We are whoever we choose to be

For every decision we make in the present

The seed of the future is inherent

Our parents have taught us another idea

Passed down through generations but based on fear

And now we've forgotten why we are here

We cling to the past, worry what's coming next

We seem to live our lives in constant regret

But we are beginning to awake and starting to remember

As the Creator stokes the evolutionary embers

And every member of the human race

Will soon have to find their place on the evolutionary scale

Though wherever you are you cannot fail

Its just Mother Earth is moving in opposite directions

Based on our subconscious reflections

So if you choose to fear and hate

That is what will be your fate

You're state of mind will draw to you

Fear and Hate in all you say and do

But if instead you choose love and tranquillity

You will start to live in your true divinity

As the Gods and Goddesses that we really are

Illuminating the light from our great Star

For this physical body is not really here

It's a hologram of light that was originally clear

But over time it’s been tainted by fear and greed

That was not part of the DNA program of our original seed

And if you heed what I am saying it’s because we can no longer hide

It's time to let go and stop the fight and to accept that we are being led

By following our Hearts and not our heads

For we have already made the decision and only in the stillness can we listen

In order to envision what we want to manifest

We no longer need to guess or walk through life with closed eyes

It's time to open them, spread wings and fly

To the next dimension that is ready and waiting

Pure and untouched with love its pulsating

Radiating peace and harmony for us to start again

As pure light beings in this new game

Because whatever we do now we cannot stop

Mother Earth's need to purge the rot

So stop falling victim to this 3D reality

That has kept us locked in Karmic causality

Radiate love and light from your inner soul

And it will be returned to you 1000 fold

For all of us are aspects of the Creator that is the ALL

And in the silence you can hear the call

Of the Great Goddess who has come to help us out

All we need to do is trust without doubt

And start living Life as a wonderful and magical gift

And remember to smile as the earth shifts.........

sort. clear. expand. sort. clear. expand.

I'm figuring out what is me and what is not. This process is excrutiating sometimes. Cycles of emotional clearing, stuff I'm sick off, but if I stuff it down or ignore it I feel worse, so let it up, let it express, dance sing cry, again and again. It is lighter then before, that's nice. It's easier and easier to choose peace, to just let the fear energy move through without acting it out, I couldnt' do that before. I read that as this new energy comes in we channel it into the earth, if we resist the flow our old patterns act out, so whenever we feel stuck all we have to do is relax and let the energy keep flowing. Our planet is being bombarbed with higher and higher frequencies all the time now. Hence the extreme polarities of dark and light that are being acted out everywhere, we're moving into a higher level of consciousness. No you're not crazy, you're releasing old patterns and stepping into more of who you truly are. What is hard for me right now is this figuring out process. Of realizing that pretty much everything I've done up until these past two years was based on what I was taught to do. What I was taught was pretty, smart, right or wrong, good or bad, this is beyond annoying to recognize. The best I can do is make peace with these realizations and stop acting them out. Who am i really??? What do I really want to do??? I made a list of when I've felt the most joy through out my life, we did this in school too at Green River, I will do more of these joy bringing activities. Writing this blog is one of them. A while back I heard this thing about how to become more clear on who you are in relationships, from this Canadian couple Mel and Nicole, their you tube channel is 'goldraytwinflames', good stuff. Anyway, he said to make a list of all your expectations for relationships, then look at where they come from, then get really angry that their not yours, then throw them all out and create your own list.

Flip right side out.

I want to write about this flip I've been feeling, a an energetic shift. It's quite subtle, but I have found the most profound changes start very small, I have to be very quiet and observant to notice. It's in my family lineage, my conditioning here, to put a lot of energy into analyzing how I'm being perceived by others. To the point that, in the past, I was completely lost to the idea of what my own needs and desires were, I couldn't even feel them. My reality was based on an imagined mirror of how others were perceiving me. The closer the person was to me the more concerned I was with how they saw me. This was unconscious for a long time, this was just what I thought reality was. It takes a lot of work and a lot of energy to constantly analyze and worry about how others see me. I am HAPPY that I have begun a shift away from this. I lay this habit to rest. And it feels good. The shift I feel feels like a fliparoo. Rather then living from the outside in, I'm letting myself live from the inside out. I feel worthy of having needs, desires and wants. I can ask for them. I don't have to explain myself away or apologize for existing. I live from my inner compass. Are you consumed with guessing how others are perceiving you? We don't have to live like this. Changing this habit starts by noticing it, acknowleding it, and then meditating on a deeper presence within ourselves. Begin to make choices from that deep inner core heart place. Ignore the voice that says 'oh, that person thinks I'm rude...etc' the voice is wrong, it's based in fear and insecurity. we are all beautiful loving beings, we all want to be happy and free.